# A Personal Inventory of Absurd Things

Source: https://www.theminimalists.com/absurd/
Published: 2026-01-29
Updated: 2026-02-09
Author: Joshua Fields Millburn

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I met a man on the street last week who had taken an inventory of everything he owned after watching my last Netflix documentary.

His color-coded spreadsheet was\
 alphabetized and sorted by room—\
 columns for each item’s\
 retail price and purchase date,\
 plus a field for miscellaneous “stuff notes.”

Staring at the cells,\
 he was confounded by\
 the absurdity of his things.

According to him, his most laughable items included…

A fondue set.\
 (He’s lactose intolerant.)

Two hairdryers.\
 (He’s bald and lives alone.)

Half a bag of kibble.\
 (He’s allergic to dogs.)

Several KitchenAid attachments.\
 (For an appliance he donated years ago.)

By cataloging his things,\
 he brought everything\
 ​out in the open—\
 shining a light on the clutter\
 that had been hidden for so long.

It was only then,\
 when the objects were on display,\
 that he felt the full weight\
 of his amassment.

Much like a retail store,\
 his inventory exposed his overstock—\
 enumerating what must go\
 to make room for worthwhile things.

As might be expected,\
 those “worthwhile” things\
 weren’t things at all. He was\
 making room for\
 freedom\
 peace\
 joy\
 love\
 and a healthy dose of self-respect\
 that a fondue pot could never contain.

Alas, his spreadsheet was not about objects.\
 It was a record of who he used to be,\
 who he imagined he might become,\
 and who he was quietly avoiding.

The absurd thing, of course,\
 wasn’t what he owned.\
 It was how long he carried it\
 without asking why.

After our conversation, this man\
 walked home and deleted his spreadsheet,\
 the same way he deleted the fondue set—\
 without ceremony, without regret.

Because…

Once you see the absurdity clearly,\
 you don’t need to itemize it anymore.\
 You simply stop carrying it.

Which made me wonder\
 what might surface\
 if we all took stock—\
 not of our things,\
 but of what we keep\
 just because we always have.

*While I don’t recommend spending time indexing your possessions, this man’s story reminds me of the Out-in-the-Open Rule, which I discuss in detail in my new audiobook, *[Very, Very Simple](https://www.theminimalists.com/vvs/)*. Download it for free today.*

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