# How to Make a Damn Decision Source: https://www.theminimalists.com/deciding/ Published: 2010-12-10 Updated: 2024-06-12 Author: The Minimalists --- Day One. The first step in any journey is often the most difficult. This was true for our journey into [minimalism](https://www.theminimalists.com/minimalism): our first step had nothing to do with a task we had to complete—our first step was *deciding*. Or, rather, deciding we wanted to make a significant change in our lives. Change is difficult, and procrastination is easy—at least for the moment. But there is no reward in procrastination. The most difficult part of creating a lasting change is deciding to make that change a reality—*deciding* to take action. ### Two Kinds of Decisions Fundamentally, there are two kinds of decisions: *intellectual* and *emotional*. Intellectually, we knew we wanted a change in our lives. We knew we were unhappy, unsatisfied, and unfulfilled. We knew we didn’t have freedom—not real [freedom](https://www.theminimalists.com/cf/). The problem was we knew these things *intellectually*, but not *emotionally*: We didn’t have the feeling in our guts that things must change. We knew they *should* change, but that change wasn’t a *must*. ### Should vs. Must It’s like anything else you tell yourself… I should change.\ I should stop wasting my [money](https://www.theminimalists.com/freedom).\ I should work fewer hours.\ I should get rid of all this junk.\ I should [eat healthier food](https://www.theminimalists.com/diet).\ I should [exercise](https://www.theminimalists.com/18min).\ I should [write](https://www.theminimalists.com/how-to-improve-writing/) more.\ I should [read](https://www.theminimalists.com/reading) more.\ I should [watch less TV](https://www.theminimalists.com/tv).\ I should, I should, I should. After a while, you end up *shoulding* all over yourself, which is an apt analogy because you really do feel like shit after you’ve put everything off for so long—after you’ve procrastinated over and over and over. Once you understand the necessity for change on an emotional level, you are able to turn your *shoulds* into *musts*. To accomplish this, we must begin to associate enough pain with our current circumstances and then equate immense pleasure with our new outcome. A mixture of enough pain combined with enough pleasure—this is how we change our *shoulds* into *musts*. This is the pivotal point.\ This is when you get leverage.\ This is when you are compelled to take action.\ This is how you make a damn decision. A decision is not a real decision until it is a *must*; it is not a real decision until you feel it on your nerve endings. Once your *shoulds* have turned into *musts*, only then you have made a real decision. I must change.\ I must stop wasting my money.\ I must work fewer hours.\ I must get rid of all this junk.\ I must eat healthier food.\ I must exercise.\ I must write more.\ I must read more.\ I must watch less TV.\ I must, I must, I must! Your only exercise today is simple: make your Must List. What are *your* musts? What must change? What has brought pain into your life? What will bring great pleasure? Take as much time as you need and write down all your *musts*. I must…\ I must…\ I must… Say your *musts* aloud. Do you feel how much more powerful the *musts* feel compared to your *shoulds*? The Should List is weak, passive, lethargic. The Must List is strong, vigorous, energetic. The *musts* are alive—you must take action! Of course, this first day isn’t even about taking action (we’ll take action every day after today), and yet Day 1 is the most difficult. Today is the day you must decide things must change. You know, at least intellectually, you are not happy with how things are in your life. But you can’t have it both ways: you can’t want it to be one way, when your actions are the other way; if your actions are not congruent with your desires, then you will never feel happy, never feel fulfilled, never feel content. Take a look at your Must List. Put that list somewhere you will see frequently. Now stop everything you are doing and make a damn decision: make the decision to change your life—to live the life you want to live. Don’t just think about the change intellectually, feel it in your gut. (By the way, you can read our Must List when you get to [Day 2](https://www.theminimalists.com/day2).) Today is the best day of your life, because today is the day everything changes: Today is the day your *shoulds* turn into *musts*. Today is the day you decide to take action. Today is the first day of the rest of your new, simplified life. ***“How to Make a Damn Decision” is Day 1 of [Our 21-Day Journey](https://theminimalists.com/21days). Move on to [Day 2](https://theminimalists.com/day2). Read Ryan’s journal entries from this journey in*[Everything That Remains](https://amzn.to/1Kkp2TW).** #### You May Also Enjoy [How to Start a Successful Blog Today](https://www.theminimalists.com/blog/) Learn how to start a blog in less than an hour. Follow the step-by-step instructions we used when starting our blog, which now has reached more than 20 million people. Creating this blog is one of the best decisions Ryan and I ever made. After all, our blog is how we earn a living. More important, it's how we add value to other people's lives. [Read more](https://www.theminimalists.com/blog/) [30-Day Minimalism Game](https://www.theminimalists.com/game/) Let's play a simple game together. We call it the 30-Day Minimalism Game. Find a friend, family member, or coworker who's willing to minimize their stuff with you next month. [Read more](https://www.theminimalists.com/game/) [11 Ways to Write Better](https://www.theminimalists.com/eleven/) We are all writers now. Whether you write books, blog posts, emails, Instagram captions, or text messages, you are a writer. No matter your preferred medium, here are a few tips to help you write more effectively. [Read more](https://www.theminimalists.com/eleven/) Subscribe to The Minimalists via [email](https://www.theminimalists.com/subscribe/).